Hey there lovely! Today I want to talk about the biggest thing holding us back from truly loving ourselves and living our best lives – the lies that we let the world slap on us without so much as a single fact check. For most of us these things go back to childhood; labels that we bought into and lugged around simply because we didn’t know we had the choice.
Take a minute, close your eyes and think of yours. “Too sensitive”, “too loud”, ” too heavy”, “too weak”, “too pushy”, “too dramatic”. . .
Whether you can identify with just one or an entire list, today we begin the process of scrutinizing these claims in order to shed the lies that are holding us back.
For me, my biggest lie was “too quiet”. For as long as I can remember, well-meaning friends, family members, teachers, and even strangers would call to attention the fact that I wasn’t as loud and boisterous as my peers. “Get out there!” or “Loosen up!” they’d say. What was simply my introverted nature was misconstrued as shy, timid, and afraid. Not only did I begin to wear these labels, but because they were associated with my inherent personality, I could not muscle my way out of them no matter how hard I tried to be the bubbly, outgoing girl everyone seemed to want me to be. I felt like something was wrong with me, but because I couldn’t change it, I just accepted it.
I think many of us have fallen into this trap. We come to accept the lie that we are broken instead of realizing that we, in fact, fit perfectly into the role we were designed to fill.
The process of unbelieving these things can be a long one. I am far from the other side, but I think it begins by asking ourselves how valid these labels actually are. We must dig deep and gather evidence that challenges these claims. If you’ve been told you are “too ______”, I’d venture to guess you can recall at least a hand-full of instances in which that statement doesn’t hold true. Once you recognize the lie, you can work on embracing your sometimes persuasiveness in situations that serve you and others.
As for me, I am currently working on appreciating my sometimes quietness as a gift. It gives me space to observe things other people may not see. It allows me think before I speak. It helps me to listen and connect more deeply with others by making them feel heard.
So, yes, I can be quiet. But I am not “too” quiet.
I can be loud, opinionated, persistent and many other things as well (ask my husband 😉 ). I am not just one thing and I am certainly not “TOO” anything.
And neither are you!